We all know the reasons a person might hesitate about adopting a rescue dog -- or any other kind of pet -- from Arkham Pet Rescue: it might be possessed, insane, or recently revived from the dead. It might be some kind of genetically-engineered abomination. Or it might be just plain evil.
But not everyone who's offered a new home to one of Arkham's rescue pets has come to a grisly and unspeakably horrible end, so today I'm going to feature some Arkham success stories.
But first, another episode from Arkham Cable's most popular late-night phone-in:
Chico (below) has settled in very well with his new owner, the boss of Arkham Cabs.
more Fail Dogs
And luckily for little Howard (below), the only insanity he's succumbed to is being (barking!) mad for football. Needless to say, he is very happy with his new owner, a British celebrity who the kennel staff have forbidden me to name (but is currently playing for L.A. Galaxy and lis married to a former Spice Girl).
And finally, former members of the cult of Dagon, Hester and Annabel (below) have gone on to become novice nuns.
I've been promising more Arkham Rescue Dogs for ages now, but first here's a typical day in the life of Arkham Pet Rescue's local estate agent:
Arlkham Pet Rescue staff assure me that today's featured dog -- whose name must never be spoken aloud -- is actually a chocolate labrador. As Arkham Pet Rescue's chief veternarian, Doctor Marinus Willet, explains: "He just happens to be a chocolate labrador who has been exposed to such unimaginable eldritch horrors most of the fur on his body simply dropped off... while the small amount remaining on his head turned white overnight."
Doctor Willet goes on to add this note of caution, "Though he's an absolutely lovely little guy, The Rescue Dog Whose Name Must Never Be Spoken Aloud does have one or two minor behavioural problems... which may or may not have contributed to his previous owner's descent into madness... and eventual death. So he's probably a dog for experienced owners only."